Well, I'm not a king, but I do have a kingdom. By kingdom, I mean I have a snake plant to rule over. And by rule over, I mean kill as slowly as possible.
I watered it today. I water it about once a month, since watering it too often makes it die. But watering it is just about the only way to interact with it, so if I don't water it, it is like not having it.

I should just get a plastic plant, and water it once a month.
I watered my snake plant today. I biked to work yesterday. I did 99 pushups.

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